I was thinking in the shower today. (Naked! Naked!)
I am an idiot. Here's why:
1) I have a hard time drinking water and breathing at the same time. Seriously. I turn blue.
2) I can make out with a guy and like, have his tongue in my mouth, but I'll break up with him if he expects me to eat off the same fork. That is SO gross.
3) I am afraid of the sound of toilets flushing in the dark. But ONLY when it is dark out.
4) I cry EVERY SINGLE TIME I watch the episode of LOST when Charlie dies.
5) I watch LOST.
6) Oh my God.
7) I am totally fine with how fat I have gotten, yet I won't wash my hair more than twice a week because I don't want it to get "damaged". UH... could I be more damaged... like... everywhere else?
8) Speaking of idiotocity, I put SEVEN different things on my face each day to prevent aging. I am going to be FORTY in ten days. Ten days, people. The bell has rung.
9) I am forty and I still have daddy issues.
10) I am forty and I still count fat grams and calories (note how little good it does me).
Anyone else feel stupid today?
(I love you).