Wednesday, January 13, 2010

I am an idiot

I was thinking in the shower today. (Naked! Naked!)

I am an idiot. Here's why:

1) I have a hard time drinking water and breathing at the same time. Seriously. I turn blue.

2) I can make out with a guy and like, have his tongue in my mouth, but I'll break up with him if he expects me to eat off the same fork. That is SO gross.

3) I am afraid of the sound of toilets flushing in the dark. But ONLY when it is dark out.

4) I cry EVERY SINGLE TIME I watch the episode of LOST when Charlie dies.

5) I watch LOST.

6) Oh my God.

7) I am totally fine with how fat I have gotten, yet I won't wash my hair more than twice a week because I don't want it to get "damaged". UH... could I be more damaged... like... everywhere else?

8) Speaking of idiotocity, I put SEVEN different things on my face each day to prevent aging. I am going to be FORTY in ten days. Ten days, people. The bell has rung.

9) I am forty and I still have daddy issues.

10) I am forty and I still count fat grams and calories (note how little good it does me).

Anyone else feel stupid today?

(I love you).



Anonymous said...

I will not concur on it. I assume polite post. Especially the designation attracted me to be familiar with the unscathed story.

Kate P said...

We all have our stupid moments. (Last week, my key got stuck in the door of the lock to the library with two dozen high school students breathing down my neck.) Thankfully, they pass. :)

Would you like a hug for numbers 3, 4, 8 & 9?

Kate P said...

Stupid again! That should read "my key got stuck in the LOCK of the DOOR." Duh, me.

Ryan said...

I jump roped on my cell phone. I'm stupid.

I don't think you're supposed to be able to drink water and breathe at the same time. That would make you a fish.

Perpetua said...

#2 isn't weird. Food other people eat gets all mushed up, while mouths maintain their original shape/texture.

I'll share food, but I won't share someone's bite marks. :)

sybil law said...

I am a total idiot. For many, many reasons.
10 days?!! Woohoooo!!!! That's awesome!!!

Extra Ordinary Me said...

Charlie dies?

Julie said...

Ok, Extra Ordinary Me just literally made me LOL.

Nina, you delight me. Idiot? Not so much.