Wednesday, April 23, 2008

Blog love gone wild

You all might remember that whallago I promised to write about blog love, a subject that thrills and confuses me -- but mostly just makes me wiggle around in my pajamas with child-like glee.

Seriously, I do that. I wiggle with glee when I find someone new and fun to read, someone I think no one knows about but me... some new blog love all my own, a new blog I can dip into and read and then return to my bloglines list without anyone knowing a thing about it.

Last couple of months, however, things got a little weird, and I found myself experiencing real jealousy for the first time in my life. It first happened when I discovered that my beloved Avi had somehow discovered the wonder of my Maggie and when I discovered that the love of my internet life, Woodrow had also been dipping into Maggie's blog and had alluded - not offered, mind you, but alluded to a willingness to impregnate her.

I kind of lost my shit.

Maggie, according to me, was MINE. How dare people click on all those links in my blogroll and visit my top secret blog friends? How DARE?

Then when I read carefully, I saw that my other top secret blog love, P, had been over to Woodrow's One Man Internet Bordello* and was all BFFs with him, too. The one true love of my internet life was all cuddled up nice and cozy with my top secret blog love! I was crushed. Betrayed on both sides. Everyone all meeting for beers and nachos and not even, like, being shy about it.

And not so very long after than, my own beloved, Julie was openly asking for new internet friends. And that sent me into a paroxysm of jealousy. My Julie.... she is mine, internet. Between Julie and me, it is not merely chatting and giggling, I can tell her anything. Anything, no matter how ugly and wrong. She is my second self, my dark twin, my confessor.

And then she suddenly wanted other internet loves. Jesus. Can you even fathom the pain?

Of course, I realized on the quick side that these feelings were absurd and irrational and the opposite of nice.

As therapy, I decided to create a mighty tribute post to everyone who had EVER stopped by my blog and commented. The plan was to out all my secret blog loves all at once so that I was sharing all that goodness I had found on my internets without prejudice. It was a painful exercise, and after I accomplished it, I thought surely I would feel better.

I didn't. The result is that now even Em has been discovered by Avitable and Woodrow. I don't even have Annie all to myself anymore.

Since then, I have had more than one reason to reflect, that is to say think long and hard, about my peculiar jealous affection for people who live in the computer. But before I say more on this subject, I would like to know what you... the people who live in my computer... have to say about my brand of internet crazy.

Say something. Anything.

* Check back later today. I have lots more to say about blog love, especially of the Woodrow variety.


Julie said...

Feh. I might have been soliciting for new loves, but you're my passion baby.

Avitable said...

You're still my favorite Nina.

Finn said...

If it makes you feel better I don't think anyone has "discovered" me yet.

Effortlessly Average said...

Well no matter what anxieties you suffer over sharing your 'net loves with others, rest assured that EA will remain, as it always has, a stoic monument to anonymity in a world of extraordinary people. You can drop my name all you want while resting assured that few, if any, will actually direct an interested gaze this way. Oh, they may come step in for a second or two, out of sheer morbid curiosity; but they will always leave with a cacophany of voices screaming in their brains that they should have denied their impulses. heh.

Jenn said...

That Woodrow, he gets around doesn't he.

Jennifer Griffin-Wiesner said...

Been there, done it,'s something in the internet wires and signals. It's like Alien; gets in and further messes up normally half-sane people.

And BTW, I know for a fact that Avitable thinks you totally rock.

Don't ask me...if I told you I'd have to kill you.

Annie said...

Hey Nina, first of all it makes me feel all wiggly that I am included here. I love you too. I have not discovered Woodrow, but now I will :-), I have fallen in love with Julie though :-). I am excited when my blog loves find one another, so I am a bit confused, but flattered by your reaction :-). By the way the link to my blog in your post does not work?? You are my favorite :-).

Sturdy Girl said...

I've had some moments with Woodrow too.

And they were magical.


Maggie said...

When I disappeared for a month I didn't read anyone's blog, not even yours, sorry to say.

Since I've been back, I haven't written anything particularly special, and as such have not been getting any more impregnation offers.

So I would say that you have nothing to worry about on my front.

As for internet love jealousy.. I love it when everyone reads each other, I only feel guilty that I don't have time to read or write more. I will confess to being a little jealous at how cool and fabulously you maintain all these relationships -- even knitting for so many of us!

Sizzle said...

I understand this very well. :)

P said...

Yeah, it's true that Woodrow tried to get wit me but he has internet crabs so I said step off what kind of ho do you think I am? And now I'm only being nice to him because it's his BIRFDAY.

But yo, I would never cheat on you. Never.

Mr. Fabulous said...

Take me, you wicked savage.

LAS said...

Well, up until this moment, I really hadn't discovered any of these people to whom you refer. But, thanks to this post - I am going to go discover them right now! I am sure almost no one has discovered me - or, if they have, they don't come back, so I'm kinda alone out here. Not that I mind.

Em said...

haha... I nearly missed this post, I'm so glad I noticed it before clicking away.

First of all, avitable has not discovered me. I discovered him through your blog and he has commented on mine maybe twice... to be polite perhaps? And I don't think I've ever seen a woodrow comment.

I completely understand the "blog love gone wild" phenomenon. It's a tricky thing this. I have felt the twinge of jealousy of which you speak and have felt the completely irrational desire to keep my super secret blog loves all to myself. But in the end, I love seeing familiar people commenting on the other blogs I read.

By the way, not only do I live in your computer, I also live in the real world. It's an amazing thing. :-)