Sunday, December 2, 2007

Sin of the Week, 12/02/07

I have every intention of going to church today. But I might not go. I have a few reasons for being reluctant.

1) Lightning might strike the building and kill innocent people the moment my fingers touch the door the my beloved St. Agnes Church. That would be very bad indeed, but the plus side is that I am pretty sure that everyone in my church goes to confession at least once a week. The whole congregation has an excellent shot at purgatory, not to mention instant airlifting to actual heaven. Good people in there. Seriously.

2) That fear aside, I have to consider the possibility that FB will be there. If he is, I have to make a stealthy exit and quite literally run home through side streets so as to avoid contact. This has happened only twice - and each time I have managed to avoid detection, mostly because he does not realize that I have chosen to move to a pew behind a pillar in Blue Lady's section. Running into FB is not too great a fear, however. He rarely comes to my church, but when he does, he has the decency not to sit in the pew we occupied together for two years. He sits elsewhere, and if he has a new girlfriend, he does not bring her. (At least not yet).

3) Let me mention again the lightning.

4) Finally, I fear the disdain of the Ladies of Compulsive Piety. They don't like it when I miss a week of Latin Mass. Of course, they have no way of knowing if I went to Novus Ordo, but still, they don't like it. Not one bit.

I will not be disclosing whether or not I made it to Latin mass. Be assured that if I don't make it to the 11 o'clock, I'll make it to the 5pm, which, while far less satisfying, still counts for not missing church.

I should also mention that if I don't grade papers today, I will get fired. I will therefore be breaking that commandment about not working on Sundays. The upside I will probablynot kill anyone today or commit any spectacular offenses against chastity or prudence. (Unless I go see Jib later).

Below, the view of First Avenue, looking north from the 14th floor of my castle.



That's the UN, in case it is not obvious. And it is snowing, which the point of the pictures.

And a view of First Avenue, looking south from the 14th floor of my castle.



That's the demolished ConEd plant, soon to be an 80 story multi-use nightmare and the death knell of my neighborhood. Will I still be living here when this monstrosity blocks out the sun and kills all the plant life in my neighborhood? Let's hope not.

4 comments:

Avitable said...

It's clear and sunshiny out my window. I have the windows open and the fan on. Beeyooootiful!

Persephone said...

We are neighbors (sort of)! If you look across the river, past the UN, you'll see cursing my godforsaken neighborhood...

The Horny Bitch said...

Men should confess more because they are at fault for not keeping us by their side.

I think I know why FB is an FB. He's not entrirely a B, to me at least.

Nina said...

Avitable, That's lovely, but I do not envy you. I like seasons. I like blistering hot and I like bitter cold. It's perfectly ok with me that it's snowing. Or that it was.

Persephone... mmmm I do love me some Astoria. Good Moroccan food and cheap hooka bars. Jackson Heights.. yay. Brb.. I am going to go to my window and wave to you.

HB, FB has been dispatched - hence the F with the B. He sort of was a B, but you are right. Sort of not.