Thursday, November 8, 2007

The horror... the horror.

Some time ago, I wrote a post about male anatomy. I was grossed out and horrified that I actually hit the orange button and published that post. After that I figured, oh well, what the hell, and I posted all manner of other disgusting stuff and declared it (unofficially) Gross Out Week.

It turns out I should have declared it Gross Out Year, because if I had, I could have posted what appears below with impunity.

Oh look! I am posting it anyway. Surprise, surprise.


Before you click this, be warned it contains the following:

1) A puppet of female anatomy

2) Tyra Banks saying "So many women in America have no idea that we don't pee and have a baby from the same hole."

3) Tyra Banks telling a story about herself and a hand mirror

4) A chubby blonde white girl who is terrified of her vagina.

For women to be ignorant about some aspects of male anatomy seems plausible, considering we are not driving that model of machine 24 hours a day, seven days a week, for our entire lives. But this?


WARNING WARNING WARNING WARNING THIS IS SO GROSS I CAN'T BELIVE IT YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED.




And then I remember how many people think eating french fries counts toward the 3-6 servings of vegetables a day and I think, OK. Yes, this.

7 comments:

Avitable said...

I might have to buy one of those puppets and then put on a kids' show at the library.

And you haven't been reading my blog very long, have you. That's not gross under any circumstances.

Slick said...

Well, I learned a lot today....

They didn't explain the whole PMS thing. Tyra is slackin'

Nina said...

Avitable, your sub-heading is "tact is for pussies," I believe? Ahem... anyway I am far more offended by the gross ignorance and insecurity and shame women feel about their bodies, so much, apparently, that Tyra Banks felt she needed to run an entire talk show about it - and just, oh my God. Suffice it to say, we do not have Donahue running shows with penis puppets, featuring men who are so scared to look at their stuff that they are literally quivering with terror. Why? Because men are NOT brought up to be afraid of or ashamed of their bodies.

Also, that shit about the pocket mirror? I basically know what the geography is - and every woman - regardless of whether she has done the pocket mirror trick - does too. I don't need to hold a three way mirror up to my EAR and study it and calm myself down about how it works to know that it does, in fact, work. Therefore, the entire fuss about "down THERE" has not to do with education and everything to do with people (the female kind, I am afraid) being ashamed of, afraid of, and conflicted about their bodies. Which is... the horror.

And no, I have not been reading your blog for very long... but I am happy to have found it. Thank you.

Slick, I am afraid this is going to make me very unpopular with pretty much every other woman on planet earth, but I can offer no insight on PMS because I have never had it. Lucky me.

Avitable said...

I do agree. That type of ignorance and fear is horrifying. I was just teasing you about horror. I posted a video of a guy and a dolphin a few months ago that still haunts me.

Maggie said...

And here I was worried that folks would be offended by my uterine photos....

Nina said...

Avitable, I will read archives looking for horrifying dolphin video.

Maggie, I have been eagerly awaiting the uterine pictures all week. Please post them soon. Thank you.

Maggie said...

Nina, dear, I appreciate the enthusiasm! They've been on display since Wednesday night; check it out!